Mother Lode for the Toad

Good evening, Toads and Toadettes,

The Toad has finally done it. No more will you have to shell out real dollars for fake degrees. You are free from having to deal with tabletop seminaries and having to suck up to specious scholastics. You won't have to wonder whether that suspect sheepsin will surface after you've hit the PayPal button for the St. Doenitz Seminart of the Holy Catholic and Apostolic Anglican Celtic Church of North America (Original Province). Nosiree, bunky!

Now you can go right to the source and get the whole magilla-diploma, transcript and letter of recommendation. The basic can be had right off the net, and the deluxe (and everyone wants the deluxe, right, boys and girls?) for a low, low price. How low, you ask? Well, let's look at the adert for Magic Mill at http://www.boxfreeconcepts.com/download/index.html:

Introducing the breakthrough concept in personal documents management!
Download 100% customizable templates and create impressive, precise credentials on your own PC! Fake Transcript Template*
Create perfect "transcripts"! Our off-line version of the Magic Mill fake transcript does it all:
• Easy to use-- opens in Microsoft Word
• 100% customizable-- change any words, numbers
• Makes both Bachelor's and Master's transcripts
• Prints on blank, "OFFICIAL" or "COPY" background
• Available immediately, just download
Transcript Template $6.00
Combo Deal-- get transcript template and diploma template for $8.00

But, wait, boys and girls, there's more!
Fake Diploma Template*

Create fantastic looking "diplomas" (view):
• You dream it up-- any fake universities, grad schools or degrees
• Enhanced version of our diploma for liberal arts colleges with the same great graphics
• Couldn't be easier-- open in Microsoft Word, type information and print
• Available immediately, just download
ALL PURCHASES ARE NONREFUNDABLE

The Diploma Template is $5.00 or you can get the "Combo Deal"- a transcript template and diploma template for $8.00. Want even more realism? Consider the Super Diploma Template!

But, why stop there? You can get other fake diploma templates:
Want diplomas for two year Associate Degrees?
Looking for high school diplomas, not college?
Undergraduate (Bachelor and Associate) or Graduate (Master and Doctor)?
Get 'em all at Magic Mill!

Don't have MS Word? Download the RTF Fake Diploma Maker.
Need it really large? Make giant 11 x 17 diplomas with the Mill's cheap and easy software.

The Toad tested these out, and came away with a new Doctor of Philosophy fron Carolina Coast University and a full undergraduate transcript from Suothern States University. The Toad even managed a 3.93 GPA with a major in philosophy and a minor in geology. Rock, rock, rock...er....Rawk, rawk, rawk.*

If these babies are good enough to fool the average employer, how impressive will they be when you trot 'em out on the average vagante bishop looking to add respectability to his operation. For that matter, you'll have a better fake degree than he does so you can just start your own church.

The Toad was most impressed with the recommendation letter he received from Prof. A.T. Buckpeshal in the Philosophy Department at Southern States U. (lovingly reprinted below) It brought a tear to the eye realizing how much old Bucky would do for his first and only amphibious student.

Of course, "by clicking the purchase button you agree to limit the use of your fake transcript and/or diploma template(s) to off-line activities solely related to entertainment. You agree the template file(s) will remain in your possession only and will not be copied for the purpose of selling or giving to others. You specifically agree that all 'educational institutions' typed onto a template will be limited to fictional entities created by you." Yeah, right. And Almy doesn't sell vestments to fake clergy either. Rawk, rawk, rawk.*

So, have at it, boys and girls. No need to bother with that pesky schooling at all. Just stop down to the old Magic Mill and you'll be preachin' and reachin' (into the pockets of the faithful) faster than you can say, "Buckpeshal"!

Yr. Obed Serv.,

Roy Aldous Toad, DD-VS (Very Specious), LSMFT, D.Phil. (Carolina Coast University); B.A. (summa cum laude)(Southern States Iniversity)
*The sound of one very educated Toad barking

Southern States University
Chapel Hill, Virginia
Philosophy Department

To whom it may concern:

Let me take this opportunity to glowingly praise Roy Aldous Toad. I had the pleasure of teaching Roy in several classes and got to know him quite well. I found him to be industrious, intelligent and very pleasant. Roy is an enthusiastic individual. He is considerate of others, always patient and blessed with a real ability to lead. In fact, in all my years of teaching here at Southern States University, I've never encountered a better all-round student.

If you are considering Roy for a job opening, I can assure you that you won't find a more earnest, loyal, hard-working or fair-minded employee. He is that rare person who was born to excel.

Sincerely,

A. T. Buckpeshal

A. T. Buckpeshal
Professor of Philosophy